Wednesday, October 6, 2010

FFFFOOORRRKKSSS Fuckery at it's Finest!

R to L: Standing: Myg, JJ, Me, LKW, VitR & Snarky. Kneeling: CCC & TM.

Holy Amazeballs batman - Who the hell are these certifiable h00rs?!?
Can you even believe that bucket full of crazyy?!?
Well, I can't either!

I just keep repeating to myself,
"I actually met Jenny Jerkface."
"I said hello to LatchkeyWife."
"I hugged SnarkierThanYou. HARD."
"I loved Myg with all my heart."
"I motorboated VitaminR70's bewbs."
 I really, really did all that.
What a fuckin' lucky bitch I am!"

What kind of VagSlice would I be if I didn't share parts of my adventure with all of you? So of course, I bring you not one, not two, but three new Cougar's Den Episodes!

Episode #40 was shot in the Hoh Forest just outside Forks. 

Hoes Mama Cougar, CullenClanCrazy and TatooMickey all up in the Hoh babyyyyyy!

Episode #41 takes place on Second Beach at LaPush after newly anointed Cougars CullenClanCrazy, TatooMickey and I drank a bottle of Vampire Cabernet on the beach. (***CoughAndMaybeaBottleofWhiteZinCough***)
(Sorry about the rough audio...turn your speakers WAY up - it was windy & shit.)

This third vid is a "quickie" - shot as Mama & TatooMickey, in a moment of true Twitardedness, underestimate the incoming tide and take an unplanned plunge in the Pacific, thereby ruining Mama's cell phone and drenching us both so thoroughly that we had to ride back to Forks in our skivies. Unfortch, Charlie didn't pull us over, because we were totally ready to do nasty stuffs to the Police Chief.

Chief Swan, we've been very bad. We may or may not have committed a felony. I think we might need a cavity search. By the way Chief, we're huge fans of your womb broom. Pornstache FOREVA.

For an album full of more ridiculous still pics, CLICK HERE.

More to come (gigglesnicker - I said "come") as soon as I recover from what was truly a life-altering experience.